Dear guy,
I'm not sure whether you can comprehend what I gave you and it's worth to me. It was never something I took lightly. Actually, after all, I was saving it for marriage. I was wearing those rings that said.. *true love waits*.. and whenever I would hang out with friends younger than I am, they would make fun of me because I had not given myself away yet..and they had. It hurt but I knew that I had to wait. And then you came along. Perhaps I gave myself to you because I truly cared about you. Perhaps I gave myself to you because I felt that if I didnt-you wouldnt want me. Perhaps I gave myself to you-to surprise people...to show them I'm not scared. Maybe I gave in for peer pressure. But whatever reason, it makes you a part of me forever. In my memory. I wish that I could erase the past-take it back-because honestly..you were never worth the gift I gave you. If so, you would still be here today. You would LOVE me with your whole heart- you would be serving Christ right beside me..and pushing forward... but no.. were leading two seperate lives now. Lives that should of remained seperate to begin with. You took a part of me that I still look back and say-man-I wish I never gave that to him. But..you cant ever take it again. This gift is repackaged..and is waiting for the right man that God has for me. He wont abuse it. He wont take it for granted. He wont use it to his advantage. He wont mock it. He wont disrespect it. He wont forget about it. It will be his.. and no matter what-the gift I gave you will seem like NOTHING anymore because of the gift I will give him.. that gift will be packaged with love,passion, and a life together-and you cant even take that away from me. Because I know...that even as I write this, you dont care an inch about what happened between us... It benefited you at the time-and thats all that matters. But, you didnt win. You will never have all of me. You never did have my heart..and you never will..
With regret,
Me
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Wow Britnee.. when i read that, it almost felt as if those words were coming from my heart instead of yours. I know EXACTLY how you feel. We have both wasted our most precious gifts to give on losers.. and the sad part is that they're related. I don't even know why I did it either. I think it was for a mixture of reasons just like you. but its good that your putting the past behind you and moving forward. just think of how things might be now if you were still together..
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